Akonnot stop listening to this song.

The musical stylings of Akon are perfect for people like me, who have very little understanding of what actually constitutes good hip hop. He has racked up an impressive number of hits (and probably a ridiculous amount of money) in the last few years by following a very simple formula where he has someone do some rapping over a synthy beat and then sings a hook in the chorus that is so catchy and drenched in auto-tune that you are forced to give him all your money. He also made a splash in the tabloid world last year when he dry humped a 14-year-old a few weeks before he threw a kid. You stay classy Akon. Anyways it is very likely that his new album, Freedom, is an attempt to clean up his image a little after these unfortunate incidents, as there is really nothing controversial at all about it. It is really catchy though, and I kind of love it. It's sort of a combination of Eurotrash techno, R&B from the future, and pure pop in a cheap disguise trying to convince you that it's hip hop, even though it's really obvious that it's not, but you don't want to say anything about it in case it becomes awkward.



FUN FACT: it took me approximately two hours to come up with the appropriate bad pun I would use as the title to this post. I feel like it was time well spent.